Changes Are Coming....

This is a long post, so I hope you’ll stick with me! I have been talking about re-doing my website (due to be up and running around the first week in May) and some changes to my business. I wanted to share some details with you along the way. Some of the changes you've already seen- like the decision to turn our popular newsletter into an online magazine format, and the publication of our very first e-book (coming soon, very soon!)

But I will also say that the decision to make these changes wasn’t super easy. Change is scary, especially if what you’re doing is OK. Because what if your new ideas flop and you wish you had just stuck with what you were doing before??  But if you want to be more than just OK, you have to take some risks. You have to get out of the boat if you’re going to walk on water, as they say…..

There are several reasons why I am re-doing my blog and website: I want my site to be well-organized and easy to navigate. I want it to be easy for you to find all of the projects and recipes that we’ve shared here.  And I want it to be pretty. The blog & website have had the same look for five years now, and it’s really time for a change!

If you have been following my blog for a little while, you know that I have already been sharing not just sewing & quilting ideas, but also lots of recipes and craft and decorating projects, too. But in getting some objective, outside opinions, I discovered that my current blog appears to be, at first glance, a quilting blog only. Also, it also doesn't showcase my artwork at all- and that is a really large part of who I am and what I do.

So the new blog and website will feature not just the quilting and sewing projects that many of you expect to find here, but much more. I hope you will like it! My goal is to reach out to a larger audience than those looking just for quilting blogs. I believe we are all creative and I believe that we all like to express our creativity in different ways. If you have visited this blog, chances are you are interested in at least some of the “home arts,” such as cooking, sewing, crafting, entertaining, gardening, decorating….. I believe that home is the best place to express our creativity. I would like this to be a place where we can inspire each other and learn from each other in all of these creative areas.

Now….. my business name. I became “The Noble Wife” sort of by accident. I had been making wool pins to benefit charity. I thought that since the pins were made of wool, it would be cool to donate the profits to a charity that provides sheep to poor families so they can start a business. I was reading Proverbs 31 in the Bible one day and came across this verse:

A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.

She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.

She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. (vs 10, 13 & 21)

I thought that was the perfect name for the pins. Then I started designing quilt patterns, and just carried over the name. However, the artwork that I do is under my name, Jacquelynne Steves. It seemed to be a little confusing that people had to remember not one, but two names for me! 

So, to simplify things, I have decided to change my business name to Jacquelynne Steves. It makes sense because I will probably always be Jacquelynne Steves, so no matter what I decide to do, the name will always fit. (Like, someday if I decide to open a car repair shop, I can just call it “Jacquelynne Steves’ Garage” and that will work! “The Noble Wife Garage” doesn’t seem to work as well, ha ha.)

My web address will be JacquelynneSteves.com. (However, TheNobleWife.com will still also work- it will be directed to my new website as well.)

Since I am going with Jacquelynne Steves for my business name, I wanted a tag line which was really descriptive of my business and what I’m about. We talked about so many! We spent days and weeks jotting down ideas (this was probably the point which drove my family the most crazy.) I went through a stack of index cards, writing down possibilities on each one and then looking at all of them and trying to decide on the best one. In the end, I decided on one that I just love and think works perfectly:

It’s perfect because the “art” refers not only to the artwork that I do, but also the art of being a home maker and being creative in your home and with your family.

So those are just some of the changes I have been working on over the last several months. (The products that I offer will change a little too, but I’ll talk about that later.) In the next weeks and months, I’ll show you more of the changes I’m making. I hope you will come along on this little adventure with me!

I’m really excited- it’s really good to shake things up once in a while and take a risk! It’s so easy to just get stuck in a rut. I firmly believe in the law of momentum- 

an object at rest tends to stay at rest, but an object in motion tends to stay in motion…..

So now…. Let me challenge you a bit. What in your life needs a little shaking up? It doesn't have to be major- it can be as simple as trying a new recipe or wearing red lipstick if you always wear pink. Or maybe it’s really big- starting a new business or having a baby or walking away from a job or relationship that is really not good for you anymore. If you feel comfortable doing so, you can share what you’d like to “shake up” in your comments below. If you’re not comfortable giving the details, then maybe just tell us that you've made the decision to start shaking things up today!

P.S. Some of my social media addresses have changed- Please click here for my new Twitter address, and click here for my new Instagram address.
Facebook would not let me change my page name.... sooooo.... find my brand new Facebook page here. (This new page will take the place of my old page.)

Painting, Writing, Baking & Trying to Focus

After all of the sewing that I did last week, this week I am writing patterns- sooooo, there's not much exciting going on here!

I did find some time to do some quick illustrations for the February Newsletter (sign up for your free subscription here)....

And I finished up 2 quilts for my next pattern so I could get them off to the quilter.....

Today, I am planning on working on some recipes for the newsletter, too. I tried one out over the weekend, and it was kind of a fail. So back to the kitchen. Good thing my family and friends don't mind eating the "mistakes."

How is everyone's 2013 going so far? So far, mine has been..... pretty much like 2012! Meaning, no huge changes. I don't make resolutions anymore- I resolved to give them up a long time ago, ha ha! I never kept them for more than 3 days anyway :). I do have some new things planned for this year, though. I mentioned in my last post that I am going to do my patterns differently, so that will be a little bit of a challenge but I am pretty excited about it- I hope you will find them to be beautiful and an excellent value for your money.

I am also looking to re-do my blog and website this year- which let me tell you is really overwhelming! Like..... I lay awake at night bed wondering how I am going to do it, in the midst of getting everything else done. You know how that is- that you feel that you really need to move on, but you can't seem to find the time for the new stuff because there's still so much stuff in your day-to-day life that you have to handle? And that is when you start to feel like you are just running on a treadmill- working and working and working but not getting anywhere. That is how I have been feeling.... so I have to figure out a way to find make time for the new stuff I want to explore.... Of course that means that some old stuff is going to have to go- and that is scary. I have ideas that I have been turning over in my head over the last several months. Oh there just aren't enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do! Maybe that is the hardest part- deciding which things to focus on, and letting the other things go.

Of course there are some things that are just a "no-brainer"- like I could watch a little less TV. Or get up a bit earlier. Or spend less time on Facebook.

(Brings to mind a saying I heard the other day:
Don't give up what you really want for what you want right now.
Yes!)

How do you get past the "planning" stage into the "doing" stage? When you have lots of ideas, how do you decide which is the best to focus on? And what have you given up in order to make more time and energy for those things?

Seeking Balance

We talk a lot about balance. I talk about and think about it all the time- trying to find it, needing to find it. Some claim that they have found it, others say (probably more honestly) that is something that they struggle with on an almost daily basis.

I am an all-or-nothing, driven, Type A personality. When I find something new that I'm interested in, I tend to do it all the way- determinedly, doggedly, unabashedly. Nothing can keep me from my pursuit... and then.... I'm done.

I find that my balance comes over the course of months or seasons. For a season, I work, work, work- 11 hours days 5 days a week plus several hours on Saturday and Sunday. And then... I am tired. I am worn out, burned out, and I wonder- why bother? There is no joy in the work anymore at that point. And I start to question whether I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing... and the answer is of course I am, but I have burned myself out and need a break, a season of rest. I think that's where I am now.

Lately I have been questioning myself- Is this what I really want? Is this what I really want to do? And when I think about it, I know the answer is yes. But I am just in one of those "rest" seasons. Resting not just from work, but from some wonderful yet emotionally stressful events. As most of you know, my oldest daughter got married last month, and youngest daughter got her driver's license and will be a high school senior next year. Which leaves me with those ambivalent feelings of Yay! I will have tons of time now/ /Oh my gosh what in the world am I going to do with all of my time???


I am in transition. Transition is exciting, fun, and scary. Really scary. Full of feelings and fears and worries and possibilities. While I am trying to feel and accept my feelings and fears (in addition to being Type A, I am also a let's Git-R-Done and not-waste-time-with-feelings type of person) I am trying to focus on the possibilities.

In this period of transition, I will remember that
My daily life will probably not be balanced, but that doesn't mean I am not living a balanced life. In the course of a week, a month, a season, a year, a life.... I will trust that I have given the appropriate amount of time and attention to every important facet of my life: my faith, my family, my work, helping others, fun and relaxation.


Some days I will work too hard, other days I will play too much, and other days I will do nothing at all. And that's OK. I just have to keep reminding myself.


 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. Ecclesiastes 3:12-13


 P.S. Don't forget the big giveaway here on my blog, and at Henry Glass Fabrics all this week.

Creative Journey

Last week I was looking for some of my artwork that I did a few years back, and found that my storage drawers were a complete wreck and totally disorganized. I figured that while I was looking for a couple of particular pieces, I might as well just organize everything.

What began as an organizing chore became a fun look back on my creative journey. I found a lot of old stuff that I had completely forgotten about it. Some of it- I still really like. Some of it- well.... let's just say it really has been a journey! It was good to see how far I've come since I started painting about 16 years ago. I WILL NOT show you that older stuff. What I thought was pretty good all of those years ago is frankly just horrible!! And I found SO MUCH that I had totally forgotten about. I did way more work than I thought. I thought about all of the hours and days and months and years represented in those drawers. I realized that I really have worked really hard to get to where I am today.

Sometimes we are not happy with the work we are doing. It just seems to be not good enough. Sometimes it is missing something, but we don't know quite what, and we don't know what to do to fix it. Creativity is not just a fun hobby or job, it is a learning process just like everything else. If you are not quite happy with your work, I suggest looking back at some things you did a few years ago, and my guess is that you will be pleasantly surprised at how far you've come.

I did throw a lot of stuff away- mostly stuff that was incomplete and I knew I'd never finish. It was a good purge- making room for the new! But I kept a lot of the stuff from my "Early Ugly Period" (I am thinking that when I'm dead and then finally become a super famous artist, that's what the historians will call it.....)- it is a good reminder of how much I've improved.(I even labelled the folder for them so it will be easy for them to archive.)

It reminds me of a couple of quotes. The first is by Ira Glass:

Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.

By the way, I don't think this is just true of beginners. As we progress, and our work improves, it can still get even better. As long as we just keep making stuff, it will get keep getting better and better. More mature, more aesthetically pleasing. Even though I am light years ahead of where I began, there is still so much to master... I look forward to the unfolding journey in the upcoming years....


The second quote that I am reminded of comes from Zechariah 4:10:
(paraphrase) Do not despise the day of small beginnings.....

Do  not despise where you are today! Keep on working and then enjoy the fruits of your labor!
(And don't despise your Early Ugly Period, either. Even Michelangelo had to start somewhere....)

P.S. The Newsletter goes out today or tomorrow... so if you'd like to sign up, go to the top upper right bar of this blog.

Fond Memories.....

I was a vendor at the Spring Quilt Blossom Show in Lancaster, PA every year for 4 or 5 years. It was a big deal for me- it was the first quilt show that I did as I ventured into the world of quilt pattern design. It was a 5 day show (now a 4 day show). My kids would get to take turns coming with me to help out at the show, then we'd hang out in the hotel room afterward, exhausted, eating Chinese take out. I stopped doing the show 2 years ago, when I began going to Quilt Market- it was just too much for me to do 2 shows that were each several days long, so close together, and I wanted to concentrate on the wholesale side of the business.

Being a vendor at one of these shows is exhausting- 10 or 11 hours a day on your feet, sometimes being so busy you feel like you can't possibly keep up. Other times, when it's slow, you feel like you are just sitting for hours, getting bored and restless. It is always good to have a "booth neighbor" that you like and get along with to help pass the time, to give each other bits of information and advice and opinions. Dottie was my booth neighbor at the Lancaster show. She had been doing the show circuit for years, and knew a lot of people. She was always generous with her encouragement and advice. She was known to pray with some of her customers in her booth. A real firecracker, she was full of energy and enthusiasm and kindness.

When I went to visit the show last week, I looked for Dottie. She wasn't in her usual space- I figured she'd just moved. I walked the show a little, and as I turned a corner, I noticed a familiar quilt hanging, with a sign that said, "In Loving Memory of Dottie Kreuger." Turns out she had died of an aneurysm last fall while swimming, of all things. Typical Dottie- going until the very end. I spoke with her daughter, who has taken over her mom's business. There was no warning, and everyone was grateful that the end came quickly for Dottie, with no pain or suffering.

It is weird that she is no longer around- she was so full of life and energy. She is one of the people in my life that I want to be like as I get older. I am sad that I will no longer see Dottie, but I am grateful that I know where she is now. Leaving the show that day was surreal- it was like closing a chapter in my life. That part is over, and I am embarking on a new one: designing fabric, writing a book. I wish Dottie could have seen that- but I have a feeling that she knows......

Goodbye Dottie, you are forever in my heart. I will miss you.

My 10 Favorite Movies

In no particular order, 10 of my favorite movies…
1. Babe- Who doesn’t love a talking singing pig? Makes me feel guilty about eating and enjoying bacon.

2. Moonstruck- The story of Loretta Castorini, her boyfriend Johnny Cammarari, her boyfriend’s brother Ronny Cammarari, her father Cosmo Castorini’s affair with Mona, and her Aunt Rita and Uncle Raymond Cappomaggi. Sadly, I did not have to look those names up- I know them by heart.

3. Indiana Jones- Harrison Ford with scruffy beard, leather jacket and fedora. Need I say more.

4. The Empire Strikes Back- Harrison Ford slinging space age pistol. Ditto.

5. Pride and Prejudice (2005- Kiera Knightly)- The costumes… Mr. Darcy... The soundtrack… Mr. Darcy... The scenery… Mr. Darcy.

6. The Princess Bride- Mawage. You’ve been mostly dead all day. As you wish….

7. Napoleon Dynamite- First time I saw it I totally didn’t get it. Glad I gave it a second, and third, and fourth, and fifth chance.

8. The Village- Some scenes filmed right here in my home county. Haunting soundtrack. Blind Ivy waits amidst impending doom as she trusts that Lucius will come to save her…. And he does. Most romantic scene ever. EVER.

9. Penelope- The story of a sweet, sheltered, cursed pig-girl with a fabulous wardrobe. And a fairy tale ending. Sigh. (Also makes me feel guilty about eating bacon, see #1.)

10. While You Were Sleeping- My favorite, favorite romantic comedy ever. Sandra Bullock is her usual funny adorable self. Perfect Christmas-time viewing.

OK- does anyone want to chime in here? Do you agree with me? Violently disagree??????
I feel like turning on the DVD player and settling in for an entire day of movie watching. Anyone with me? I’ll go make the popcorn…..

PS thanks a million to Charlie Sheen for stopping by and taking the time to comment on my last post. I know what a busy guy you are nowadays.....

Bumps

Last week I mentioned that I wanted to try to become more “transparent” and let people see more of the “real” me. I am generally a pretty private person, and it is with great difficulty that I reveal my true and honest feelings. But in this case, I really want to give hope to others who might be struggling.
Today I wanted to write about bumps in the road of life. We all know that everyone encounters them. But I am afraid that sometimes, especially when our blogs are used not just to stay connected, but also in part as a marketing tool for business, we are less than honest.
We try to put out best face forward, we don’t talk about the rejections. We all post when we have a new design published, or are featured here or there, or have a new line out…. But how many times do you read something about a designer getting her submission sent back?? It happens to everyone- we just don’t (publicly) talk about it- I guess we don’t want to look less than successful. I have found that for every success I have had, there have been multiple rejections and failures. I still get rejected- quite a bit. A magazine doesn’t pick up a design, an editor refuses to answer my emails, someone who seemed to be my new best friend at one Quilt Market walks right by me without a second glance at the next Market. It is easy for me to let these things bring me down, make me feel less than, and feel like I will never achieve my goals. But generally, in business as in life, success is built with small steps, not leaps and bounds. Sure, there are occasionally those huge, heady moments- you sign a contract with a company you have been wanting to work with for a long time, you finally get a project in a magazine, your first book proposal gets accepted by a publisher. But 99.9% of the time those achievements are preceded by lots of hard work and failed attempts.
I have hit many bumps. At a Quilt Market a couple of years ago, I was approached by the vice president of a fabric company. We discussed the possibility of my designing for the company- and I was so excited! I sent her artwork as she requested, and then she strung me along for a good 6 months. My emails went unanswered, so I assumed she was no longer interested. To make a long story short, at the next Market, when I said I wasn’t sure if her company would be a good fit for me, she walked away and over her shoulder, as a parting blow, she said to me, “That’s OK- It doesn’t matter.” I was stunned. My heart was in my throat, and I wanted to crawl under the table. After treating me very shabbily, what she was saying was that I didn’t matter, she didn’t need me. Clearly, a low point. I went back to my hotel room that night and cried and cried. I told a fabric designer friend what had happened and she was furious that I had been treated that way. I was pretty sure that that would be my last Market. It was just too darned painful.
The next day, a design director from Henry Glass Fabrics came to my booth and asked me if I was interested in designing fabric. I said yes (although, I was quite tentative, as you can imagine). To sum it up- things worked out- I have had a great working relationship with them, and I am very happy to be finally doing something that I have dreamed of doing for about 10 years.
Now, I was approached by Henry Glass at my second ever Quilt Market, and many people would say that was really fast. But, I had been working on other areas of art and design and licensing for about 10 years- so I really wouldn’t call myself and overnight success.
And while I am being completely honest- I am tired of the “overnight” success stories! They are either less than true because the person laid groundwork for a long, long time, or their story is extremely unusual and they were just really, really lucky. I just don’t want budding designers and artists to think that because they get rejected they aren’t good enough. Sometimes skills need to be further honed, but often times, the timing is just not right, and sometimes it’s just really, really, really hard to get your foot in the door- trust me, I know! One story that really made me want to throw my magazine across the room was one in which the person being interviewed said she just decided one day to be an artist and the “universe obliged” and one year later she was featured in magazines and teaching workshops. Stories like this made me feel horrible about myself, because I assumed that because it was taking me so long to succeed, and others seemed to be doing it with so little time and effort, that there was something wrong with me. Now I see that maybe those success stories have left out a lot of details. I am NOT belittling anyone else’s success- I’m just saying that most have worked really hard and faced their share of rejection and failure before they succeeded.
Please, let me repeat, I want to be honest because I don’t want aspiring artists and designers out there to be frustrated. It takes a long time to establish relationships, to develop a style, to learn how to be a professional. I hope I don’t sound bitter- I’m so grateful for what I get to do and for any achievements I have made.
I don’t know if I will ever feel like I have “arrived”. There will always be someone more famous, more successful, and more talented than me. But what I do know is that I have tried NOT being in the creative field- and I was miserable. It has taken me years of stops and starts to be absolutely sure to my core that this is what I was meant to do. And if the day ever comes when this is not what I am supposed to be doing anymore, God will let me know.
My advice to those of you out there who are discouraged and wondering if you will ever “make it” or if you are doing what you are supposed to be doing: sorry it’s so cliché, but- listen to your heart. Do you feel in your bones that this is what you were meant to do? Can you not imagine doing anything else? You may not get an answer immediately- it took me many years to realize that I could not escape it. But keep taking steps, don’t be afraid to ask for advice, and keep learning. You never know where your dreams, patience and perseverance will take you.
And how is this for irony: when I was almost finished writing this post today, I was rejected. I got an email from an editor who said she was sending my submission back because they weren’t using it. Ouch! But perfect timing as I wrote this! There was a time when that would have brought me down for days or weeks- but now it just hurts for a little while, then I get over it and move on.
I have been really honest here. I hope no one gets offended. I am just trying to be real, and I hope it doesn’t backfire on me! I am kind of terrified as I go to hit the “publish” button……

10 Things About Me...

I am a pretty private person- I keep a lot inside, and open up to very, very few people (like, 2). Most of the time, I am a fortress. But occasionally there are those times that I let way too much slip out- and terrify myself. One of the things I am trying to do is be a more open person. So in the next few weeks, I will be revealing a little more of myself to my readers- some of it will be light and silly, and some deeper (this will be difficult for me- so please be kind! I know you will be.)
This week, we will be keeping it light and silly. Here are 10 things you may or may not know about me (in no particular order):
1. My favorite color is red. I also like variations on red like pink, coral, and sometimes orange.

2. I have a love/hate relationship with chocolate. Love to eat it, but hate that I can’t seem to eat just one.

3. I married my college sweetheart and my first & only love 21 ½ years ago at the age of 23. So now you also know how old I am (that’s a freebie).

4. When I was 10 my favorite show was “Quincy” starring Jack Klugman, and I wanted to be a medical examiner when I grew up.

5. When I was 13 my favorite movie was “Indiana Jones” and I wanted to be an archeologist when I grew up.

6. My favorite thing to do on a Friday night is to order Chinese takeout or a pizza and spend the whole night on the sofa watching movies with my family. (I don’t mind doing that on a Saturday or Sunday night either.)

7. I sing on the worship team at my church every Sunday. After 3 years of doing this, I can finally sing solos without feeling like I am going to pass out from nerves.

8. I have 2 daughters, ages 16 and 20, whom I adore. I can’t believe what beautiful, talented, smart, funny girls they are, and how blessed I am to have them.

9. I often wish I’d had just one more girl. 3 daughters would be extra nice.

10. I don’t like coffee. I wish I did, because I feel like I’m missing out on the whole “Starbucks Experience”. Tea just doesn’t seem the same, and I feel like there’s a big “coffee club” that I’m not a member of…

So those are a handful of things about me, maybe more than you ever wanted to know- ha ha! Is there anything you’d like to know about me or what I do? Leave your question in the comments, or just send me an email, and maybe (if the answer won’t embarrass me too much) I will answer it in a post someday.

Jacquelynne Steves is NOT in the Bahamas

Hello Everyone! I hope you are all enjoying a peaceful New Year so far..... and that you haven't fallen off the "resolution wagon" yet! I stopped making resolutions a few years ago, because, 1. I don't think I've kept a resolution past January 3 in my life, and 2. Because to me new year's resolutions are just another reason to procrastinate. If I feel that there is something I need to work on, I think there is no time like the present- why wait till January 1, or Monday, or the kids go back to school, or whatever.... I should just do it. And that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

So right now I am sitting on the sofa, recuperating from more surgery. I managed to get an appointment last week with a new doctor (I got some recommendations from a friend who is a nurse, and other doctors' first available appointments weren't until the end of January or mid-February.) So I went to this doctor, and figured that if I didn't like him, I would go to yet a different one later in January, I had nothing to lose. But as it turned out, I did really like him, and he was able to fit me in for surgery yesterday (Monday), which was OK with me because I just want all of this to be over. Based on my tests and symptoms, he thought I had endometriosis in addition to everything else, which, it turns out, I do. So I had a laparoscopy to look around my abdomen to see if there was anything else going on in there, and a D&C to remove some of the endometriosis, and he also lasered off a cyst on my ovary, among other things. Unfortunately, he was unable to remove the fibroid, because there may be some bladder involvement. I have to go back to see him in 2 to 3 weeks, and then there will probably be another surgery, with the gynecologist to remove the fibroid, and a gynourologist, in case there needs to be any repair to my bladder.

Sheesh, I am tired of being a patient, and just tired of being patient!!! But my family has been really wonderful, my oldest daughter is still home for college for another week and she cheerfully helps me around the house and brings me everything I need and drives her sister to school for me. I told her, 19 years ago I was taking care of her, and now she is taking care of me! But at least she doesn't have to change my diapers (at least for another 40 or 50 years, anyway.....)

So for now I get to lay on the sofa and be waited on hand and foot, and take some narcotics and just generally be lazy with good excuse (however, if you are interested in this lifestyle, I recommend going to the Bahamas- sans the narcotics- instead of surgery. It costs less and is slightly more pleasant. And your friends will appreciate the postcards from the Bahamas a lot more. Although, if you remember, after my last surgery, I did come home with a lovely photo of my bladder which I declined to post here. Maybe I will put it on the family Christmas card next year.)

A cheerful heart is good medicine. Proverbs 17:22

P.S. Thanks to all of you who emailed yesterday regarding the At Water's Edge fabric. I will try to email everyone back today or tomorrow.

Waiting.....

When I saw the doctor last Wednesday, he said there was a possibility that my biopsy would be back on Friday. So at about 5 minutes after 2 on Friday I called to see if it had come in. The receptionist said that it had. I asked to speak to the doctor, but she said he had already left. She said the reports had come in just minutes before I called, after he had left for the weekend. I don't begrudge the guy taking off early on a Friday, but why last Friday?? I got to spend the whole weekend knowing that my report was sitting on his desk, and that the receptionist knows what I have, but I don't. I imagined maybe my friend and I breaking in to the office, and making a copy of the report for myself. But when I picture that scenario in my head, it looks like a Laverne and Shirley episode, so I decided to just let it go..... The doctor does surgery on Mondays, so I don't know if I will hear from him at all today. I will probably just have to wait until my appointment tomorrow (have I mentioned that I am extremely impatient and a control freak?)

I have to admit that when this all began, I would characterize my faith as "weak." I knew ultimately that God would take care of me, but my fear was that things wouldn't turn out the way I wanted them to. While God always holds us in the palm of His hand, some people do not get physical healing. My fear was that I would die much earlier than I had planned.... My fear was that God taking care of me would entail me having peace with my premature suffering and death (I really do have a very active imagination, I know.) I never asked myself  "Why me?", it has always been "Why not me?" Why shouldn't I be the one to get cancer.... sometimes bad things, terrible things, happen. I just don't want them to happen to me, but I recognize that they very well could. (notice how many times I and me appear in this paragraph- I have hilighted them for you, just in case you didn't notice. Could it be that my focus on myself, and not on Him, is the problem......)

The day that I got a bad test report and went to the church in the middle of a breakdown, the lady praying with me was first praying for me and my family to have peace. And I remember thinking- No, no! not peace! Healing! Pray for healing, because I do not want this thing that I fear so much. Of course, then she did pray for healing for me. But isn't it funny (and very human) that we want our pain and suffering to be taken away, instead of just asking God to use it! I lean on the works of the apostle Paul, who said:

there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:7-12)

Oh, to be like James, who wrote: Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything (James 1:2-4)

Oh goodness- does he really expect me to consider my trials a joy, because they develop perseverance and character!? What I really want is just to live a simple life, free from pain and drama.... I just want to go on with my plans for my life.... Really, is developing perseverance and character that important.... can't I just skip that part....

The first week or 2 of all of this, I was paralyzed with fear. People were telling me that these tests are often wrong and don't mean anything. I have to admit, that made me angry- because even though that may be completely true, when it is happening to you, it is terrifying, and you don't want to feel like maybe you are overreacting and being irrational. And no matter how many people rally around you and support you and pray for you- you still know that ultimately you are alone in it. No one else can walk through it for you. I realized early on that this was just gonna me and God walking through this one together..... Even though I leaned on God and trusted Him..... my human self was just terrified, and even though people were telling me that God had me in the palm of His hand, it was hard to believe, many times I just didn't feel it. I mean, I believed and had faith, but I didn't really believe and have faith. Does anyone understand what I mean? It's like I had it in my head, but it took a while to work down into my heart. Like the father of the possessed boy who said to Jesus- I do believe! Help me overcome my unbelief! Mark 9:24. We believe, we think we believe, but there is always another level of faith that we strive toward.

So about 10 days ago, I guess all the prayers that people were praying for me to have peace actually kicked in. Suddenly, almost overnight, I felt better. I still had to have the biopsy, I still feared the surgery itself. But I have no longer been paralyzed by the fear of the outcome. Somehow, I really know that I am going to be OK. I have been able to move on with my life and enjoy my family and enjoy the holiday season. I have somehow been able to "look past the curve" (I will explain that one later- this post is already too long.) The only explanation I have for how I went from terror to peace is a miraculous work of God on my heart, an answer to the prayers of so many.....

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7.

Free at Last!

I woke up at 4 am in a panic. Oh no! Did I really do a post talking about my catheter! Yikes! I expect that readers will turn away in droves. But then I read your really kind comments, and I felt better. I really am a private person. But I guess 2 weeks away from the blog really gives one the urge to purge!!!
I went to the urologist this morning, and he removed the catheter. Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty! Free at last! I feel better already. Now I just have to wait till Tuesday for the biopsy results. He said he will call me if he hears anything sooner, but right now I am just assuming that I have to wait another whole week.

So, life goes on. I am trying to catch up on stuff, it feels good to be back in my studio. A little bit of normalcy. I think I will work on making some wool pins. My inventory is very low. I ordered a bunch of wool back at the beginning of November, thinking I would spend any free time I had in December making pins. Then all of this happened. I think it will be good to think about someone other than ME for a change. On a particularly bad day a couple of weeks ago, I found myself in Walgreen's with a shopping cart full of toys for the local women's and children's shelter. I just didn't know what else to do with myself. Doing something for someone else is always good therapy, and in conjunction with "retail therapy", well, I think that is just a good combination!

It is just 9 days till Christmas. I have not baked a single cookie. Oh well. Daughter comes home from college on Thursday, so maybe the kids will make them this year. Then again, not having the cookies in the house has probably saved me from gaining my usual "Christmas cookie weight" this year, so maybe it's not such a bad thing. And I am really trying to eat healthier, because I never want to go through something like this again. Maybe my body is trying to tell me that I am no longer young and invincible, but I am aging, just like my parents and grandparents. Middle age stinks! But I would not trade the wisdom I have gained for my 20 year old body and face. And of course, it is during our most difficult times that God really reveals Himself to us (I'm sure it has more to do with the fact that during trials we are vulnerable and needy and desperate for Him, and we will seek Him more, and not because He is more present in difficult situations..... He is always the same, always present.... it is just during these times that we can really see Him, because we look for Him...)


The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
For in the day of trouble
He will keep me safe in His dwelling;
He will hide me in the shelter of His tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock.
Psalm 27

Where in the World is Jacquelynne Steves??

Many some two of you may be wondering where I have been. It has been a heckuva couple of weeks (and not in a good way.) I have been going through a really difficult time. I thought about blogging it- but frankly, it has been hard enough to just live it, I just didn't feel like sitting down and writing it and rehashing it. I know for some people, writing is therapeutic, but for me in this case, I have spent most of my time trying not to think about it. Also, my kids read my blog and I didn't want to freak them out.

I apologize that this is a very long post, and I hope it is not too graphic. I have spent a long time considering how much I should divulge.  But it has been the major part of my life lately, and it feels dishonest to blog about Christmas decorations when, right now, they are the furthest thing from my mind. I am usually a very private person, but God and the prayers of many wonderful and faithful friends have, and continue, to lead me through this.

A couple of months ago at my regular gyn appointment, I mentioned to the doctor that I felt bloated and crampy etc. so she gave me a prescription for an ultrasound. I put it off for 2 1/2 months because I figured it would just turn out to be something like fibroids or something, and hey, I was busy, you know? So I finally got around to going for the ultrasound in mid-November. After calling a couple of times for the results, I finally heard back from them 6 days later (after I left a message demanding that they call me) and they tell me I have a mass on my bladder and recommend a CT scan. So I called for that appointment, and had to wait another 6 days. Which made for an anxious Thanksgiving week for me. And that's when things got worse.

Monday November 30.  Drink disgusting barium and go for CT of pelvis and abdomen. Ask the doctor's office to call me right away with the results, since I have now been waiting around for a week wondering if this "mass" is something to be worried about. Of course, my mind wanders to the darkest scenarios possible.

Tuesday December 1. Receive word from gyn in morning that there is definitely a mass, she recommends I get to a urologist ASAP. And by the way, I also have a couple of kidney stones, a slightly enlarged uterus, and fluid on one of my ovaries. She recommends (under her breath, so that others in the office can't hear her) that I don't go to a local hospital and instead go to a large city hospital, and tells me to let them know if there is anything at all they can do for me..... I make some calls. Get a recommendation for a urologist from a lady in our church who is currently undergoing bladder cancer treatment. Call the urologist and get appointment for the next day. They want me to bring the CT scan films, so I arrange to pick them up at the radiologist.

Wednesday December 2. Pick up the films and written report from the radiologist. Get in my car and read the report. Mass on bladder.... lesion on kidney..... something else "uncharacterized" in my liver and the base of my lungs. I hyperventilate, freak out, feel like I am going to throw up. This is the end of me, I have just found out how I am going to die. Start to drive home. Decide to stop at church because I don't want to go home and be by myself. A couple of ladies at church pray and talk me through my breakdown.
I go home, hubby comes home from work to go to doctor appointment with me. I let him eat his lunch, and then tell him that the report looks really bad and start to confess my fears. He assures me that yes I will see my daughters get married and see my grandchildren and live a long life. He is a rock, I am falling apart.
See the urologist. He looks at my bladder with something called a cystoscope- not a pleasant experience. The tumor is not in my bladder, but behind it, possibly on my uterus, pushing in on the bladder. He gives me a script for a STAT MRI and sends me home with an antibiotic to prevent an infection from the test he performed. For the next 18 hours, peeing is torture. He tells me to see my gyn for the CT report, because he thinks this is a gynecological issue.

Thursday December 4. Go for MRI. One of the techs makes an innocent inquiry regarding what they have found on my CT scan. I spend the next hour in the MRI tube (aka "coffin") with nothing else to do but think about my impending doom.
I have tried to get through the week and do what I need to do- Christmas shopping, help build the Christmas Village at church, go to choir practice, etc. In the evenings at church, people comment that they haven't seen me wear glasses before. I don't tell them that I can't wear my contacts because I have spent the week crying. I deal with being really angry with myself for waiting 2 1/2 months to get the ultrasound. If this ends up really bad, it's my fault....

Friday December 5. Hubby goes with me to gyn appointment to get the MRI report. I am full of anxiety. I have not been to this office before, and I find it odd that there is a young guy about 22 years old working the desk. I have never been to a gyn office where the office staff was male, unless the male was the doctor. Also, I find it disconcerting that apparently it is "casual Friday" and this guy is wearing baggy jeans, a Phillies sweatshirt, and a Phillies baseball cap. This does not set my mind at ease. He looks like he is going to a baseball game, and he's working in my doctor's office. Seems unprofessional and does not put me at ease. Finally go in to see the doctor. There are 2 MRI reports- 1 abdomen, 1 for pelvis. The pelvic MRI does show a mass on my bladder, but the abdominal one is OK- no mention of anything on my kidney, liver, pancreas..... She sends me back to the urologist. I break into tears. She thinks that it is because I still don't have an answer about what this thing is- but I explain to her that I am so relieved that apparently, my body is not full of cancer. I come home and call the urologist's office and get an appointment for Tuesday. Later I tell my husband and a couple of friends that I have never been so relieved to find out that I might "just" have bladder cancer.

Monday December 7. I have an appointment with my primary physician for a routine physical, which I had scheduled a couple of months previously. I keep the appointment and hope he can give me some answers. He is sure that this cannot be biopsied in the urologist's office, so he gets the ball rolling with my pre-op testing so that whenever they can take me, I will be ready to go. I leave his office and go for bloodwork (which I can do since I have not eaten all day- I have not been able to eat for at least a week....) and then I go for a STAT CT of my chest, just to make sure that whatever it was in my lungs that they saw on the first CT scan is not something to worry about. He reassures me several times that he is over-reacting, but it is disconcerting to say the least to be handed a script that says- STAT CT of chest, rule out metastases, bladder tumor. I call the radiologist from my car, at first they want me to wait till Wednesday, but I tell them it is a stat order so they squeeze me in that afternoon.

Tuesday December 8. Appointment with urologist. He will schedule me for same day surgery at the hospital on Monday for the biopsy. I ask if I really have to wait that long, he replies that he does surgery on Mondays, unless it's an emergency, and this is not an emergency (well, maybe not to him.....) He says I may come home with a catheter.... I really hope not.

Wednesday December 9. Back to primary physician to get a note for medical clearance for surgery, get EKG done. Come home. 2 hours later, I break out into a horrendous rash that is red and angry looking and itchy.  Are you kidding me? I've already been to my primary physician's office twice this week. My husband thinks it looks like a drug reaction. I find this odd, because I have just taken the 13th of 14 doses of the antibiotic I received last week. You would think I'd react when I first begin to take it. Go to bed hoping it will be better when I wake up.

Thursday December 10. Rash is worse. Go back to primary physician. What do you know? It is a drug reaction- I am now allergic to sulfa. Get prescription for steroids to help calm my system down before surgery on Monday. In the afternoon, I go to my pre-op appointment at the hospital. Fill out the forms etc. They will call me between 2 and 5 pm on Friday to let me know what time to report to the hospital on Monday.

Friday December 11. The first day in a long time that I have not had a doctor's appointment or test. I get the call to arrive at the hospital at 11:30 am on Monday. No food or water after midnight Sunday.

Monday December 13. Arrive at the hospital. Terribly dehydrated and feeling icky. They have trouble finding my veins for the IV. I am scheduled to go in at 12:45, but they don't take me in until 3. I am weepy. They give me something to calm me down, but I am still weepy. The last thing I remember as I go to sleep is a very kind nurse, caressing the tears from my cheek and telling me it's going to be OK. She is an angel. When I wake up, the first thing I feel is a catheter. Crap. I was really hoping to avoid that. Also, my throat is killing me, so I guess they intubated me, though no one mentions that. Nurse helps me to get dressed. The doctor has also given hubby a picture of my bladder to bring home (I will spare you and not post it here!) Hubby picks me up at the door and drives me home. I spend the next 4 hours on the couch, watching Penelope and Little Shop of Horrors on DVD. Younger daughter comes home from her grandmother's and kindly fetches anything I need. When it is bedtime, hubby helps me walk to the kitchen for a glass of water so I can take my antibiotic (not sulfa....) After a few minutes, I start to feel really dizzy. My face is hot and there is ringing in my ears. I sit on the kitchen floor, and after a couple of minutes I don't feel better and wonder if we should call the doctor. I then lay down on the kitchen floor. A few minutes on the cool kitchen floor makes me feel better. Hubby helps me up to bed. He has to help me out of my clothes and into my pajamas, and drains my catheter bag for me. He is a saint. It is hard to get comfortable in bed. It is hard to sleep.

Tuesday December 15. I wake up feeling a little better. Still weak from not eating and a little dizzy. But hubby has taken another day off from work, helps me shower and dress and get downstairs, and makes me something to eat. Have I mentioned that he is a saint?
The biopsy will take 5-7 days to come back, so now I just wait....

This has been the longest few weeks of my life. I am ever grateful for the prayers and wonderful support I have received from so many. God has taught me a lot through this, and I would like to share some of that a little later. If you have spent the time to read through this whole post- thanks for your patience.

The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
He will quiet you with His love,
And rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

My Turn- The 40 Day Fast

Today it is my turn to fast and pray. Please also join Adam who is also posting today.

Let me start with this: I don’t like fasting. There, I said it. Now that that’s out of the way....

I don’t like fasting because it doesn’t feel good. It’s not comfortable. I’d really rather have the feeling of calm, slight sedation that a belly full of good food gives than the empty, hollow, gnawing, light-headed feeling that fasting brings. I like comfort. I like knowing what to expect. I don’t like surprises and I don’t like anything that makes me feel yucky or ooky in the least.

Of course, you know that expression about the box: think outside the box, get out of your box. Well, I will be the very first to admit- I like my box. I like it a lot, actually. I was thinking that maybe a better metaphor for my life would be that I like to live inside a bubble. But that really doesn’t fit because in a bubble you can presumably look out and others can look in. But in my box, I can avoid looking out, I only see what’s going on inside my box. When I take a peek out, if I don’t like what I see, I can close up the box again. And others can’t look through my box to see what’s really going on in here. Oh I might give them a peek through an air hole or something, but they’ll really only get to see what I want them to see, not too much, not enough to see what life is really like inside my box.

Like most of us, I don’t like thinking about the things that really go on in the world. It is too uncomfortable, too painful. When I really look at the lives that most people on the planet live, I realize that I pretty much live like royalty. That sounds silly to the average American, since I don’t live in a mansion or castle, and I don’t have servants (not even a cleaning lady once or twice a month, and believe me, it shows). But tell that to the couple of billion people who live on less than $2.00 a day. Think about it. Take your monthly expenses and divide them by 30 and see what you get- hundreds of dollars?

So anyway, this is the kind of stuff that I don’t like to think about here in my box. Because when I do I am faced with the responsibility placed on my shoulders through the Scriptures- From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked. Luke 12:48 Uh oh..... How am I going to live up to that responsibility? How can I, “just” a mom, “just” a wife, “just” a regular average person, change the world? The answer is, I can’t. I can’t change the whole world. But I am responsible to do what’s in my power. And it turns out that that’s way more than I ever imagined, anyway.


I am posting today about World Vision, specifically about their gift catalog. I love the gift catalog because it helps provide a tangible connection for the donor. If I write a check to an organization’s general fund, I know that it will be well used but I don't really know where the money went. Through the gift catalog, my family and I can choose how we want our money to be spent- livestock or seeds for micro-enterprise? Education for a child in Africa or China? Clothing and school supplies for a child in America? Clean drinking water? Medicine and medical supplies? The gift catalog is one stop shopping for life saving and life altering donations. And donating in someone’s name makes a great, meaningful gift for the special people in your life. If you request it, World Vision will send the recipient a nice card telling them about the gift donated in their honor.


For a couple of years now, I have been making wool pins and donating the money through World Vision’s gift catalog to buy sheep for poor families around the world. A sheep provides wool for warm clothing, milk for nourishment, and lambs for market. It is literally life saving for a family with no means of supporting themselves. This is a sustainable livelihood for the family, with tremendous ripple effect. Children are healthier, have the opportunity to go to school, then contribute significantly to their families and communities- you know what I mean. It starts so small, so seemingly insignificantly.......

The physical metamorphosis that takes place in a family which is given the opportunity to support and sustain themselves is unquestionable, but in speaking to Jeff Eichenlaub, New York Area Director for World Vision, I discovered something even more significant. Jeff frequently uses the term transformational to describe what micro-enterprise does, but he is speaking of something much deeper than the physical and financial benefits. In giving a gift of $105 to purchase a sheep, or $30 to purchase 5 ducks, or in purchasing some other form of livestock or micro-enterprise supplies, you can “send a little package of hope to someone. For people that the government and no one else cares about, it is like Christmas a hundred times over. It makes them realize that ‘I am not worthless, somebody from America cares enough about me to send me this gift, this hope.’”

Hope. For the cost of a couple of pizzas, I can not only help bring dignity to a household and affect literally generations of people, I can give real, honest to goodness HOPE. I guess that kind of is changing the world, isn’t it?

And isn’t that what the Gospel is all about?

Nik is a hard working man, but life is hard if there is not a stable income. Both Nik and his wife have been unemployed for fifteen years now. They live on what the land produces. Many times Nik and his sons have had to migrate to Greece and Italy for seasonal work, leaving the rest of the family behind. However, life for the Doshi family has been much better since the family received four sheep from World Vision's gift catalogue. Each of the sheep produces one litre of milk a day which Nik's wife uses to make cheese, butter and yoghurt. Some of the goods they sell, and the leftovers go to the family for daily consumption. With the income brought in by the four sheep, Nik has bought five more sheep. "It has helped our financial situation and it has kept the family together," says Nik.

Photo and story provided by World Vision

44 Sheep and Counting

I have been making wool pins for a couple of years now and I donate all the profits to World Vision to buy sheep for poor families. This has truly been a labor of love, I started making these pins at a really low point in my life, and it helped to give me a sense of purpose when I was feeling kind of lost. (Read how I got started here.)

I just finished totalling up all my numbers after the last Quilt Show, and I am thrilled to announce that since I started doing this in December 2005, The Noble Wife has purchased 44 Sheep! That's 44 families who now have a chance at a better life because they have a way to start a business which will sustain their family. A heartfelt Thank You to everyone who has supported me and this endeavor!!!!!

I think, no, I know, we all want to feel that there is some higher purpose to our lives. I think we all want to know that our lives have meant something, and let's face it, especially for those of us who are moms, we sometimes wonder if it really matters if our floors are spotless and the laundry is caught up (for the record, mine is not.) We wonder if what we do day in and day out really matters (and by the way- it really does.)

And I think it is really easy to get discouraged, because the problems seem so big. And it makes us feel so small, so helpless, so inconsequential. As a kid, I had a big heart. I wanted to help all of those poor little starving children on the TV commercials, but I was repeatedly told, You can't save the world, Jack (that's what they still call me!). But one day, when God got through to my hardened heart and cut through my cynicism, I realized- Maybe I can't save the world, but for the one person I might be able to help, it would mean the world to them. I found World Vision (and there are lots of really good, reputable, responsible organizations out there) and I found out that the cost of a pizza ($20) could prevent deadly malaria for a whole family. Or for the cost of my family of 4 going out to dinner 1 time ($60), a family could receive 10 fruit trees to provide food, income at market, and shade. So I really couldn't tell myself anymore that there was nothing I could do.

World Vision has a catalog where you can find these directed donation ideas, and many more. This is a great way to get kids involved in giving, too. I guarantee you will get back much more than you can ever give, and you will never be sorry.

The Story Behind "The Noble Wife"

I started The Noble Wife about 2 or 3 years ago. I was, at that time, primarily a watercolor artist (though I dabbled in all kinds of creative mediums), and I was submitting my work to a lot of different companies, publications, and individuals. The rejections just kept pouring in. Finally, a phone conversation with one particularly unencouraging woman (yes, she really knew how to put the "brutal" in brutal honesty) was all I could take. Heartbroken, exhausted, and defeated, I swore I'd never paint again, never submit any work ever again, it was just too painful (I tear up as I write this even now, years later-the pain was that deep.) I felt that the biggest dream in my life, the thing that I wanted most, was just not meant to be. I had tried and tried, and I just seemed to keep hitting dead ends. (Now, of course, I realize that being so sensitive is part of my nature, and in fact part of what makes me an artist....but that is an entry for another day....)
So, at that point, I took to the sofa for several months, basically just feeling lost and unfocused and like the biggest loser there ever was. (Did I mention that in addition to being very sensitive, I'm also a little prone to self pity?) One day, while on my sofa, I was reading Proverbs 31. You know how you can see or hear or read something a hundred times, and then one day it's like finding it for the very first time? Well, as I read that passage, it was like I had never heard it before. A lot of people are intimidated by the woman described in that passage- she's up before dawn, cooking and cleaning; she runs a sewing business; she dabbles in real estate and farming; she is her husband's jewel; and she still has time for her charity work. Whew! some lofty goals there. I mean really, who could measure up to that?
But this time when I read it, I began to think- I can do that...

Pr 31:10 Who can find a noble wife?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Pr 31:13 She chooses wool and flax.
She loves to work with her hands. (I can do that...)
Pr 31:16 She considers a field and buys it.
She uses some of the money she earns to plant a vineyard.
Pr 31:17 She gets ready to work hard.
Her arms are strong. (I can do that, I like to work in the garden...)
Pr 31:19 With one hand she holds the wool.
With the other she spins the thread. (I can do that...well not the wool spinning part, but I can dye it and cut it out and sew it back together again)
Pr 31:20 She opens her arms to those who are poor.
She reaches out her hands to those who are needy. (I can do that...I have always wanted to help the poor, since I was a kid)
Pr 31:22 She makes her own bed coverings. (Hey, I make quilts...)
She is dressed in fine linen and purple clothes.
Pr 31:24 She makes linen clothes and sells them. (I've done lots of craft shows in my time...)
Pr 31:25 She puts on strength and honor as if they were her clothes.
She can laugh at the days that are coming. (I can put my future in God's hands...)
Pr 31:26 She speaks wisely.
She teaches faithfully.
Pr 31:30 Charm is deceptive and beauty fades.
But a woman who has respect for the LORD should be praised. (I can do that....)

And so on my sofa that day, I thought about some wool pins I had made while I was just messing around in my sewing room, and this idea dropped into my head....What if I made these pins and sold them and donated the money to buy sheep for poor people.... Wool... sheep...the needy....

Truly, I can't take credit for that idea. I'm sure it came from God. And while I was busy helping someone else, it seemed to pull me out of a deep, deep depression and reignited my passion for creating.

I have sold hundreds of those pins at craft shows, quilt shows, and through word of mouth. I have donated all my labor and most of the supplies. People think I am a really nice person for doing it, but the truth is, that left to my own devices I could possibly be the most selfish person in the world (or at least in the top 10). It is only my reliance on God and Jesus Christ that helps me to be better, softer, more loving.
Now, I did not name this endeavor The Noble Wife because I think that's what I am, it is simply what I strive to be.
So I know that was long, but that is the story. (Oh, and I also added hand painted pins done in watercolors, all the profits for those go to drill water wells around the world.)